T-SHIRT TIIIIIME
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
Nicole and Ryder… their communications are hysterical. They don’t really talk to each other. They more or less grunt.
— Jwoww, Jersey Shore
I used to beat girl ups like that in high school.
— Jwoww, Jersey Shore
FEEL HER BOOBS AND THEN FEEL YOURS.
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
Mike’s got ADD
— Ronnie, Jersey Shore
Her clothes are already in a ball, let’s just put it in a garbage bag.
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
She brought all these random people home…she’s a girl, you don’t do that. That’s a guy thing. Guy’s do that…not girls.
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
I would say it’s almost, “T-SHIRT TIME”
— The Guys, Jersey Shore
What is your name? Situation. The Name of the person? Situation.
— Mike, Jersey Shore
I always have a good time when I go out to the clubs…but in the back of my mind I’m thinkin’ I got a girl here, I got pajamas picked out already…this girl wants to bang me! I wanna go back to the crib.
— Mike, Jersey Shore
OH YEAH!
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
Yo, this is Mike’s wife. He’s finally found one as crazy as him.
— Vinny, Jersey Shore
I LOVE CANADA!
— Mike, Jersey Shore
It’s not your bed. Who gives a fuck?
— Angelina, Jersey Shore
…next thing you know, she’s eating an egg and cheese sandwich with MVP. You can’t find ‘em like that anymore.
— Mike, Jersey Shore
It’s wake up the entire house time! OH YEAH WAKE UP YEAH OH YEAH WAKE UP YEAH
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
What I would love to find is a guido, juicehead… Can I find that somewhere? Because I’m not going to go on Match.Com again.
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
My v-neck is so fresh that I skiped t-shirt time, like it defied the rules of t-shirt time.
— Vinny, Jersey Shore
I think Angelina loves my sloppy seconds. She goes to Vinny and she’s trying to go to what’s-his-name. Like, what are you doing? If you want to make out with me, just ask. I will say yes.
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
Okay, hold my earrings.
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
Standing in one corner, 4 foot 9, 2 inches with the poof, ‘Snooki’ Polizzi… standing in the other corner at 322 lbs, the Staten Island Dump.
— Ronnie, Jersey Shore
I’m still pretty bitch!
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
To call me fake, it’s just blasphemy to talk against the leader like that, in other countries you get hung for that type of shit.
— Mike, Jersey Shore
Yo, she so big dawg she broke the bed dawg
— Mike, The Situation, Jersey Shore
We got a situation.
— Mike, The Situation, Jersey Shore
Oh Yeah, Oh Yeah
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
Eww, smells like Lobsters. Are they alive?
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
I’m not sure what Lobsters eat, but I think they eat insects or something, so I wan gonna feed them worms
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
Oh no! It’s upside down! HE’S GONNA DROWN
— Jwoww, Jersey Shore
It goes in Saltwater you idiot
— Vinny, Jersey Shore
Well, Charlie’s Dead. CHARLIE’S DEAD. CHARLIE’S FREAKING DEAD NOW.
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
wahhhh. we tried.
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
OH YEAH CHAMPAGNE YEAH
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
You’ve got to be real careful, because a grenade can blow up anywhere. So stand clear. Safety first.
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
Oh, yeah, in the jacuzzi, yeah!
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
Hello. Palace of Love… CABS ARE HERE!
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
It’s all good in the hood.
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
I’m not gonna get my nails done with her.
— Jwoww, Jersey Shore
A little homosexual; Three guys in a hot tub.
— Jwoww, Jersey Shore
Back in the day, they had a prophecy that one day, there would be a pimp of all pimps, and his name would be; The Situation.
— Mike, The Situation, Jersey Shore
This girl is literally on a ship taking off for a different planet right now; Like she’s not even worth talking to.
— Jwoww, Jersey Shore
We click so well just because we’re the same person. She’s real, I’m real. She likes to party, I like to party. And every time we’re together, pretty much just go crazy and be stupid.
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
She acts like she’s 10 years old. She’s like twenty-fucking-three.
— Mike, The Situation, Jersey Shore
I’m, like, begging you. I’m trying to have fun, but you’re, like, too much.
— Girl, Jersey Shore
Eww, its like a turd that won’t get off your a******
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
Snooki is a drama queen and she likes to get coddled, and I’m not gonna do that.
— Mike, The Situation, Jersey Shore
What’d you put in it? Just Chicken…. EW
— Snooki & Ryder, Jersey Shore
There’s no way I’m going to Jersey without my hair gel, can’t leave without my gel.
— Pauly D, Jersey Shore
Your number one mission is to go out and find the hottest guido and take him home.
— Sammi, Jersey Shore
A guidette is somebody who knows how to club it up, takes really good care of themselves, has pretty hair, cakes on makeup, has tanned skin, wears the hottest heals, pretty much they know how to own it and rock it.
— Sammi, Jersey Shore
I’m like a praying mantis, after I have sex with a guy I will rip their heads off.
— Jwoww, Jersey Shore
I am all natural. I have real boobs. I have a nice fat ass. Look at this sh*t, I mean, come on, I’m hot.
— Angelina, Jersey Shore
Get ready to party, get out there, get filthy, creepy and weird.
— Ronnie, Jersey Shore
MY CAR IS DEAD! IT DIED
— Snooki, Jersey Shore
I’m the smallest guy here, FUCK
— Vinny, Jersey Shore
[...] Guys! I added some new Jersey Shore Quotes, because who doesn’t like the Jersey Shore? Haha, I love that show. Snooki & Jwoww are [...]
I Can’t See The Costumers, I Can’t See The ice Cream I’m A Fucking Smurf! -Snooki
You dirty little hamster.-The situation.
Caller: Can I speak to Angelina please? … Snooki: NO, she died.
Bahhahaa. Lmfao(:
Angelina is like the Staten Island Fairy, everyone gets to ride and its free
Situation
These quotes are friggin hilarious!!!
Snooki and Jwoww are the s.h.i.t.
“I am all natural. I have real boobs. I have a nice fat ass. Look at this sh*t, I mean, come on, I’m hot.”-Angelina ”Loose 10 Pounds and Then we can talk(:” -The situation
I find this site to be very useful, yet well structured and maintained. Something that I do not agree with is not giving credit where credit is due. Many if not all of these Jersey Shore Quotes were taken from my site, as they were transcribed by me. The internet is a place to be free, but credit would be nice! Keep up the good work.
bahahahaha ; ohh yeaah, pauuly d, yeaah. <3333333333
Jersey Shore season 3 is gonnna be amazinqqq<3
Jwoww && Pauuly are the hoottest in the hooouse !!! <3 (;
“Angelina go hit the treadmill , actually go hit the elliptical its better for you” – Situation
“More like the Rob Kardashian of Satin Island
“I hate the ocean. It’s all whale sperm.”
-Snooki
HAHAHAHAHAHAH
“Where’s the beach?” …….um you re on it……”"where? I still dont see it!” , snooks
NEVER fall in love at the Jersey Shore. – Ronnie
Never fall in-love at the Jersey Shore – Ronnie
WOW I LUV THE jersy shore creew is soo awsome i luv them all like i am thire biggest fan ever luv u jersy shore
GTl = Gym Tan Laundry , MVP = Mike Vinny Pauly (:
”Guy’s are Douchebag’s and i hate then all. They dont know how to treat women , and i feel like this is why the lesbian rate , is going uo in this country. – Snooks (: Truue Chiiz . !!
Were goinq to be eatin by crockidles Yeah! -Pauly D
“i feel like this rug is Ron and Sam’s relationship”
F.O.W.S.T. find out who Sammi’s textiing(;
You forgot one
Guys just don’t know how to treat a girl. I believe thats why the lesbian rates are going up… -Snookie, Jersey Shore ♥
Oh yeah, Pauly is sexy yeah ! :] ♥
You can stay here and get your ass beat or you can stay here and get your ass beat either way your gonna get that Ass beat – jwoww
HILARIOUS. Snooki & Jwoww ftw! <3
All the girls are pretty except Angelina.
If she still has a basket on her bike, SHE’S TOO YOUNG FOR YOU BRO! -Pauly D
If she still has parental controls on her tv in the bedroom, SHE’S TO YOUNG FOR YOU BRO! -Pauly D
TAXI SON AQUI! TAXI SON AQUI! -Pauly D, Jersey Shore in Italy
jersey shoree was the best show ever ! :0
Fist pump, pushup, chapsttick- vinny and pauly d
Pauly d is sooooooooooo sexxxxxxy
If a person does not know to which port one is sailing, no wind is favorable.
Business, that’s easily defined – it’s other’s money.